


The Benefits Of Mayhem

by blarfkey



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: BAMF Lace Harding, Dragon fights!, F/M, Quietly Smitten Krem, big damn kiss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-16
Updated: 2020-11-16
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:14:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27329377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blarfkey/pseuds/blarfkey
Summary: Krem learns something unexpected yet very important about Lace in the field:She's fucking crazy.
Relationships: Cremisius "Krem" Aclassi/Lace Harding
Comments: 12
Kudos: 35
Collections: 2020 A Paragon of Their Kind Dragon Age Dwarf Exchange





	The Benefits Of Mayhem

**Author's Note:**

  * For [WizardofOzymandias](https://archiveofourown.org/users/WizardofOzymandias/gifts).



> This was so fun and cute to write! Thanks for the prompt!

Krem learns something unexpected yet very important about Lace in the field:

She's fucking crazy.

He's used to the Boss seeing a dragon and losing all shred of rational thought and will to live. That's nothing new. But he had felt relieved when Lace Harding decided to join them on one last raid through the Emerald Graves to clear out the templars, because she always acted like she had some sense.

How very wrong he was.

First of all, she's fucking lethal with that bow. Krem knew, theoretically, that she was good from her practice shots in the training yard. But it's another thing entirely to watch her sink arrow after arrow into people's fucking eyes.

Remind him never to piss her off in another drinking game.

Second of all, when the unmistakable thundering shudder of a high dragon shakes the ground around them, her eyes get just as wide as Iron Bull's. They look at each other with mirrored expressions of unadulterated delight and any hope that she would talk the Boss out of yet another death-defying bloodbath went right over the cliff they're standing on.

"Mayhem?" Bull asks.

Wait what?

Lace grins, wide and feral. " _ Mayhem _ ."

Bull lets out a ferocious growl and raises his axe in the air and this is gonna happen, isn’t it?

Krem facepalms. "You two can't be serious -- we have a job to do!"

"We did the job, Cream Puff," says Bull with a heart slap on his shoulders that makes Krem nearly trip over the edge of the cliff. "It's been two hours at least since we've seen a red templar. And I'm getting bored."

"And I want dragon bone arrows," adds Lace.

"You're gonna deny her dragon bone arrows?" Bull demands, swinging his one eye to Krem.

Krem glares at his boss, fighting the flush rising up his cheeks. Because after a year of getting to know Lace between scouting missions for the Inquisition, there's nothing Krem would deny her and Boss knows it. And now he's flaunting that information  _ in front of her _ .

"I hope that thing eats you," he says, not breaking eye contact.

"If only I should be so lucky," Bull growls.

Weird. It's weird, okay? But Krem's a good Second and he keeps his ire only to grumbles and eyerolls as they seek out the lair of this Maker-cursed dragon.

It’s big, of course. It’s tongue is bigger than Krem’s mattress, each tooth the roughly the shape and size of a five foot seven stupid tevinter merc. Oh, and it shoots streams of bone-snapping ice from that mouth. 

Every dragon fight comes with one harrowing moment where Krem thinks he might not make it, doomed to haunt Bull as a spirit through relentless cockblocking and hiding his eyepatch in the stables. 

This moment comes with Krem’s feet encased in ice, pinning him to the ground, the shadow of this behemoth hovering over him while Krem adjusts his grip on his sword and whispers a prayer to the Maker. 

Usually Bull bails him out, or Dalish with her “bow” but before anyone else could react, Harding slides on her knees and points her bow up and shoots that fucker right in the throat, three times in quick succession. 

The dragon throws its head back and screams, giving Dalish enough time to melt the ice around his feet with a carefully aimed fireball and allowing him to back up. 

Panic threatens the edge of his thoughts, but Krem shakes it away and joins back into the fight, hacking at the monster’s feet while Bull attempts to climb up on its back. It’s just another near miss -- old hat by now. 

There’s also a certain point in fighting a dragon where Krem doesn’t think it’ll ever be over. That’s usually the moment when Bull drives an ax through its head or Dalish will blast it in the belly with some kind of bomb magic --

Not this time. While Bull grips the horns of this thing like he’s breaking in a stubborn mount, holding on for dear life while he waits for his moment, Harding ducks under Krem’s arm and shoots it right through the center of it’s eye.

A shot like that shouldn’t even be  _ possible _ . 

Hell, if Krem wasn’t in love with her before, a shot like that would be worthy of a marriage proposal. 

Holy fucking  _ shit. _

For one breathless moment the dragon freezes, ice snorting out of his nose. No one dares to even breathe. Not even Bull raises his axe, despite the perfect opportunity to do so.

Then the dragon shudders and collapses, shaking the ground hard enough for Krem to lose his balance and fall flat on his ass. Not that he cares. All the adrenaline-laced panic he put off washes over him in full force -- full body shudders, pounding heart, dragging shaky breaths into his lungs

And the kind of euphoria that only comes with brushes with death. 

“ _ HORNS UP _ !” Bull shouts from atop the dragon’s skull, holding his axe up in the air with both hands. 

“ _ HORNS UP _ !” Krem shouts back, his voice mingling with the others. 

Just when he struggles to his feet, Lace throws herself at him and knocks him back down. 

“That was  _ amazing _ !” she squeals, blood/ichor/whatever the fuck streaking across her freckled cheek. 

Krem reaches up and wipes it away with his equally disgusting gloves. 

Time stutters to a halt for a moment. He’s entranced by how green her eyes are from such close distance, how many freckles she has, like spilled cinnamon. How badly he wants to kiss her, but that’s nothing new. 

Then she grabs his shirt front and pulls him up to her mouth and kisses all the breath back out of him. 

It takes half a second of blind disbelief before Krem cradles her face in his hands and kisses back with equal enthusiasm. It’s probably nothing more than a Thank The Maker We’re Alive Kiss and he really does not fucking care at this point. 

“Fucking finally, Cream Puff!” Iron Bull shouts. 

Krem pulls his hand away from her hair just long enough to give Bull the rudest gesture he can do one handed. 

Then he slides it back behind her head where it belongs. 


End file.
